Whenever video evidence of some random citizen’s criminal behavior goes viral, I find myself audibly chanting a familiar mantra: “Please don’t let them be from Baltimore. Please don’t let them be from Baltimore.”

This week’s current Internet Main Character, Jack Callis, is indeed a Maryland native and apparent Baltimore Ravens fan. But Callis, 24, who is being held without bond over attacks on two Washington Commanders supporters in Federal Hill after the two teams faced off at M&T Bank Stadium, now lives in Sarasota, Florida.

This now becomes complicated. The incident combines Ravens fans, who are generally thought of as friendly, with the image of Baltimoreans as violent and thuggish writ large and loud in the imagination of people who’ve never set foot here. Toss in Florida Man, that mythical archetype of a weird and sometimes feral humanoid who causes odd shenanigans that sometimes involve gators, and it’s a whole mess.

None of this makes either region look great, and I am proud to say because I have lived in both, this guy is not representative of most residents of either. I take it all personally, because, like Callis, I am a Baltimore-adjacent person who relocated for a while to the Sunshine State. I have always considered myself primarily a Maryland Woman. Still I admit to some secondhand embarrassment each time there’s a story about a Florida Man, say, leading cops on a multi-county chase in an 18-wheeler truck, or impersonating a security guard to get into a Taylor Swift show. Stop bringing shame to a whole state, y’all!

Callis’ attorney, Brian Thompson, did not deny it was Callis on video beating up Commanders fans apparently unprovoked. But at the bail review, Thompson contended that Callis was on a ”couple week cocaine and alcohol bender” and had shown he was not a flight risk by coming back to Maryland to surrender himself after the attack. Thompson said Callis was also significantly overcharged for a fight during which there were no apparent weapons and “no one beat someone with a billy club.”

Oh, OK. All Americans are entitled to a legal defense when charged with a crime, but “dude was high and didn’t stab nobody” doesn’t exactly sing of blamelessness. And the whole situation puts an ugly stain on a city that has enough issues with our public image without a former resident flying into town for foolishness. I guarantee you that all a lot of folks reading these headlines from around the country were like “Baltimore? Of course.” To paraphrase “Mean Girls,” he doesn’t even go here. I mean, he used to. But not anymore. Keep that mess in Florida.

The ultimate victims are, of course, the Commanders fans who got attacked. But it’s not fair that the incident depicts Baltimore sports fans — who mostly have a reputation of intense, if sometimes drunken, enthusiasm — in a bad light. Sure, I once had a big argument with my late husband Scott, a Ravens die-hard, when we were visiting our hometown and watched a game in a bar that played that irritating “Shots” song every time the team scored, and the customers were smashed before halftime. Scott was not amused to waste the one Ravens game of our vacation on this silliness. But no one got beat up.

Here’s the thing: Baltimore is not even as bad as you think it is! Yeah, we have myriad issues, but even the White House called our 2024 reduction in homicides “the greatest success story” in the country. And even with our reputation with crime, our specific sports fans don’t have the sketchy reputation of, say, those from Philadelphia, who threw snowballs at Santa after an Eagles game. And the Eagles had won!

I am not making light of a real-life dangerous situation. I’m so sorry for those Washington fans who got attacked, and given the general divided state of our nation, I can’t help but be sad that we can’t even watch a damn football game without starting a turf war. It’s a football game you didn’t play, my guy, one that your team won, but you still made it into some sort of sports “West Side Story.”

Callis was indicted by a grand jury Friday on one count of first-degree assault and three counts of second-degree assault, but he hasn’t been convicted, and legally, who knows what’s going to happen? I’m just sad that once again, this city is associated with violence. Nobody needs that. At the end of the day, the Ravens won, but Callis — and Baltimore — lost.