For the past two years, Michelle Hines said, she’s tried to write a statement describing how the murder of her son has affected her life.

“How do you put something that’s unimaginable into words?” Hines asked inside a courtroom in Baltimore.

“My soul is missing right now,” she added. “And I’m trying to find it.”

Hines’ son, Izaiah Carter, was fatally shot on March 6, 2023, at Joseph E. Lee Park in Southeast Baltimore across from Patterson High School. He was 16.

On Thursday, Roger Alvarado-Mendoza entered an Alford plea in Baltimore Circuit Court to first-degree murder in the killing for a sentence of life, suspending all but 45 years in prison. That means he maintained his innocence but acknowledged that prosecutors had enough evidence to secure a conviction.

Circuit Judge Sylvester B. Cox Jr. told Alvarado-Mendoza, 25, of Dundalk, that he took the life of a young man and will have to live with that reality.

Hines, the judge noted, gave birth to her son when she was 17. But she never had the chance to see him reach that age.

Cox said he’s been coming to the Clarence M. Mitchell Jr. Courthouse in different positions for more than 40 years.

“This never gets past me, what murder does to people,” Cox said. “It will never be normal.”

Carter was a sophomore at Patterson High School and a member of the Junior Reserve Officers’ Training Corps who planned to join the U.S. Air Force. He worked at Forno Restaurant + Wine Bar and enjoyed making music.

Family members described him as a loving, caring and giving teenager who possessed a kind soul. He had a quirky smile and exuded positivity, according to his obituary.

“He was not a man,” said Wood Johnson, Carter’s stepfather, who had been in his life since he was 6. “He was a boy on the way to adulthood.”

Carter’s aunt, Crystal Pryor, described him as a “light in all of our lives.”

Pryor called Alvarado-Mendoza a coward and demon who took away an “amazing soul” and “one of God’s angels on Earth.”

“As a family, we are broken,” Pryor said. “Because this man has stolen from us.”

Assistant State’s Attorney Alyssa Ragland urged the judge to accept the plea agreement for the murder, which she described as senseless and brutal.

Alvarado-Mendoza must also spend five years on probation.

Tony Heper, Alvarado-Mendoza’s attorney, said his client came to the United States from Honduras when he was 17 and received asylum.

Alvarado-Mendoza, he said, essentially grew up by himself and worked as a carpet installer.

Law enforcement apprehended Alvarado-Mendoza on March 20, 2023, in Texas before he could flee across the border to Mexico. He later confessed to the killing.

“This is certainly a very unfortunate, very sad occurrence,” Heper said. “My client wishes this all could be undone.”

During the hearing, Alvarado-Mendoza bowed his head but did not show emotion. He declined to address the court.

Heper said his client does not understand why he committed the crime.