Becoming a stay-at-home parent overnight wasn’t Tatiana’s choice.

On the first Friday in April, the public affairs specialist was laid off by what was once seen as one of the nation’s most stable employers. That same day, the Rockville resident canceled the child care she could no longer afford and was suddenly thrust into the nation’s oldest career: stay-at-home parent.

Tatiana is one of over 100,000 federal workers who have lost their jobs or been targeted for layoffs since President Donald Trump took office. As his administration considers ways to shrink government and incentivize Americans to have more children, the federal layoffs are pushing parents out of the workforce.

In turn, they’ve had to give up or at least scale back on child care and some are panicking over the thousands they’ve already spent on summer programs. Many have treasured extra time with their kids but struggle to balance that while applying for jobs in an oversaturated market.

For Tatiana, that means she and her husband, who lost his hotel manager job a year ago, take turns looking after their 4-year-old so they can both can job hunt. Tatiana asked to be identified by her first name only because she fears speaking out could jeopardize her husband’s immigration status and the four months of severance pay she secured.

The couple is saving $1,700 a month on preschool, but their daughter is no longer in a structured environment, surrounded by friends her own age.

When one parent is on child care duty, the other is always checking in.

“I was calling him every 10 minutes, like, ‘Are you OK? Do you need anything? Is the house OK?’” Tatiana said.

The new arrangements have had some benefits: Tatiana realized her “busybody” kid writes her letters backward and words from right to left, things she wouldn’t have noticed otherwise. Tatiana hopes occupational therapy will improve those fine motor skills.

As parents lose their jobs, kids can lose their structure, routine and essential social time, said Christina Lopez, president of the Maryland Association for the Education of Young Children.

“If a family is going through stress, it’s difficult to manage that and give your children everything that they need,” Lopez said. “The children feel that. They may not understand, but they know when … their caregivers and their loved ones are so stressed.”

For Amanda’s family, the stress began in January, when she and her husband, both federal employees, were ordered back to the office full-time. Amanda, who asked to be identified by her first name because her former department doesn’t allow employees to speak to the press, had been working remotely since 2020.

The mother of three started getting to work at 6 a.m. to be back for preschool pickup at 3 p.m. There were no after-care slots open when the return-to-office orders came down.

Within a month, Amanda had mouth ulcers and trouble sleeping through the night because of the stress she felt at work. There were rumors she and other employees might get relocated to different states.

“What pushed me over the edge was after doing everything, they still said our jobs were at risk,” Amanda said. “As a parent, I think about the type of person I want to be a lot. And I want to make decisions I would want my kids to make. I want to be working in a place where people respect me and value me.”

Amanda took a voluntary deferred resignation, a decision she knows she was only able to make because her husband works and the two had savings. But they’ve still had to scale back.

Her 1-year-old now only goes to day care twice a week; Amanda didn’t want to pull him out entirely and lose his spot. Her 3-year-old is in preschool and her 5-year-old is in a Howard County kindergarten, but both are out of school in the summer. Amanda spent thousands of dollars on coveted summer camp spots that she’s now trying to cancel and get partial refunds.

“It’s risky, because you have to plan ahead. You want to get a spot but you don’t know where you’re going to land,” said Amanda, who is getting paid through September. “It didn’t feel wise to spend $350 per kid, per week, if I’m at home.”

While Amanda is excited to spend more time with her kids this summer “going on little adventures,” like to the nature center or the pool, it’ll be difficult for her to fully enjoy it if she doesn’t get a job soon, she said.

As a stay-at-home parent, Amanda still gets up at 4:30 a.m. to help her husband before he heads to the office. While her baby naps, she applies to jobs, which she said feels like full-time work. When he’s awake, they play and run errands. She finds her adult socialization at day care pick-up, community events and church.

Lopez, the young children’s education association president, recommends that parents lean on their community, especially those rallying around federal workers. Howard County, for example, has job fairs tailored to those employees, drawing hundreds. At those events, parents can drop their kids off in a small room with snacks, coloring books, toys and child care workers and focus solely on securing interviews and potential job offers.

Tatiana said her job search has been frustrating in the six weeks since she attended one of those fairs. Recently, she thought she’d found a job with the remote options she’ll need with her daughter at home. The 4-year-old can’t start at a lower-cost and part-time pre-K until August.

Tatiana got used to working through the night in graduate school while her baby slept, so she’s open to working odd hours, but this job wouldn’t have been as flexible as she’d hoped, she said. She’d been willing to take a 60% pay cut to start working again, but learned the pay would be even lower than she’d thought.

“What I would be making is not a fraction of what I used to make, but it’s something. Like a step in the door,” Tatiana said. “I’ve talked about this with friends. They tell me, ‘Are you sure you want to go for this, or do you want to wait for that perfect job?’

“I tell them I don’t have time to waste.”

About the Education Hub

This reporting is part of The Banner’s Education Hub, community-funded journalism that provides parents with resources they need to make decisions about how their children learn. Read more.