It was easy to get along with Dr. Lillian Blackmon Crenshaw so long as you followed her rules.

Born in the thick of the Great Depression, she was a serious woman who could come off as strict or intimidating, those who knew her said. Her profession demanded that intensity — but past what may have seemed a hard exterior was a compassionate and kind heart.

She was an accomplished perinatologist and neonatologist who spent her life improving medical care for mothers with high-risk pregnancies and babies born prematurely. She spent 25 of those years at the University of Maryland School of Medicine.

Those closest to her also thought her strong and disciplined, but they knew Blackmon Crenshaw beyond her national recognition. They saw the side of her that was a kind and generous church-goer; a stepmother devoted to her family; a doting grandmother who melted the moment a baby was placed in her arms.

“She didn’t do anything without a lot of deliberation, but when she committed, it was going to happen,” said her stepson, Bill Crenshaw. That is how he will remember her.

Blackmon Crenshaw, who also helped design national guidelines for the care of premature babies, died Feb. 25 of Lewy body dementia. She was 87.

Blackmon Crenshaw was born May 12, 1937, and raised in Arkadelphia, Arkansas. Her father taught religion at Ouachita Baptist University, while her mother was a homemaker.

Medicine was an early calling, but it was uncommon for women to pursue the profession at that time. She earned an undergraduate degree from Ouachita in 1959. When she told her father she wanted to go to medical school, he stressed the uphill battle ahead.

“Do you know this is going to be very difficult?” he asked Blackmon Crenshaw, who later relayed the story to her stepson. She replied, “Yes,” and he replied, “OK,” and that was that.

She was among the first female students at the University of Arkansas Medical School, graduating in 1963. She then worked and trained at various institutions, including the University of California Los Angeles and Columbia University.

She quickly became well known in her field and was named director of the neonatal intensive care unit at the Children’s Hospital of San Francisco. While there, she successfully advocated to change California law to mandate health insurance for newborns immediately after birth. Afterward, she headed to the Medical College of Georgia.

But it wasn’t until she headed to Duke University in 1972 that her personal life caught up to her professional accomplishments. She met Dr. Carlyle Crenshaw, an obstetrician who specialized in high-risk maternity care. They developed a work partnership that turned romantic. The couple didn’t often talk about their love story, but Bill Crenshaw said it was “pretty obvious he pursued her.”

They married in 1979, after Carlyle Crenshaw one day told her they were going shopping but wouldn’t say for what. They landed at a jewelry store to pick out an engagement ring, their son said.

Blackmon Crenshaw gained four stepchildren through that marriage — Bill, Faith Crenshaw Millspaugh, Hugh Crenshaw and M. Carlyle Crenshaw III. All were grown at the time, but they still saw the love the couple shared.

“He made sure that she was happy,” Bill Crenshaw said. His father once spent weeks finding the perfect old-fashioned recipe for his wife.

The couple moved to Baltimore and began working at the University of Maryland in 1980. They spent 15 years working together, sometimes caring for the same patients, until Carlyle Crenshaw died in a 1995 car crash.

She got more serious after that, Bill Crenshaw said. At first, she nor the kids knew what their relationship would look like without Carlyle. But “everybody got closer with her, because she needed it,” her stepson said.

“She’d say, ‘I really miss your father,’” he said. “And she never pursued anyone, and she was just perfectly happy to be alone.”

Blackmon Crenshaw continued working at the University of Maryland until her retirement in 2006. While there, she oversaw renovations to the NICU and launched Maryland’s Fellowship Program in Neonatal-Perinatal Medicine. She’d received numerous awards, which continued after her exit.

Even before then, her reputation preceded her. Dr. Christopher Harmon, an obstetrician, arrived at the University of Maryland in 1997. Though she was a bit self-effacing and often deflected compliments, “the ability to work with her and learn from her was a tremendous addition to my career,” Harmon said.

“She had this uncommon combination of compassion not only for the babies but for their families,” he said. “Her clinical care was almost unassailable.”

Blackmon Crenshaw also penned dozens of medical papers and served on various state and national advisory committees. Through her work, doctors were able to better understand the transition from fetal to newborn life, Harmon said.

“A lasting impact on families in Maryland has been the understanding that different levels of care are required by different levels of complications or problems in pregnancy, and that we have the resources now in Maryland to address all those levels of complications,” he said.

After retiring, Blackmon Crenshaw traveled a bit and spent time with her family. She often drove down to her farm outside of Easton, and she enjoyed quilting and attending the symphony. The biggest part of her later years, though, was the Woodbrook Baptist Church.

Blackmon Crenshaw was involved in just about every part of the church, said Debbie Riley, a close friend. She was a deacon chair, taught Sunday school and hosted annual retreats for the women’s ministry.

But her most memorable commitment to the church was Wednesday night dinner service. She became chief chef and was famous for her hot potato salad and ham dinner. She was a “good Southern cook,” Riley said. She was also a cherished friend and a maternal figure.

“She should be remembered as the kind and generous person that she was,” Riley said. “She gave so much.”

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