The point of a boycott is to cause financial and reputational pain to the organization, business or person being boycotted. But I believe, for the effort to have real impact, the boycott must be painful for the boycotter, too. It has to cost you something, as refusing to take the bus did for Black people in Birmingham, Alabama, during the Civil Rights Movement, or as avoiding big events in North Carolina to protest the passing of a homophobic bill did major organizations. Avoiding whatever the target may be should interrupt your everyday routine.

For myself and a lot of other people, that target is currently … Target.

Since I moved back to Baltimore in 2020, I have consistently spent more money under the auspices of that familiar red bull’s-eye than at any other retailer, and it’s not even close. According to the Circle 360 membership info on my Target app, I spent nearly $900 there from Nov. 1 to Jan. 25 on everything from groceries and gift wrap to a hammer and a nutcracker. It’s been my go-to.

But, since the Minnesota retail behemoth announced the planned end of its three-year commitment to diversity, equity and inclusion measures, I’ve decided to go to stores who value diverse communities as much as they do our money.

DEI is not about giving unqualified people advantages but ensuring that qualified people who have previously been excluded get consideration. Somehow it’s become shorthand for “inferior Black, brown and not-straight people are taking your jobs.” Target is not the only store to roll back its DEI efforts in the wake of the new presidential administration’s condemnation of such measures, but it is an outlet that garnered so much money and credibility for its previous full-throated support of Black businesses.

I know this ending of its DEI program was planned, but the timing seems convenient. Stores don’t love you, but they should at least value your business. I reached out to Target’s corporate communications people for comment but didn’t hear back.

Many of my friends, family and social media contacts are vowing to stop or seriously curtail their Target shopping. Last week activists in Minnesota called for a nationwide boycott starting Feb. 1, but some of us started before then.

“I usually end up at Target at least once a week and spend way too much money. My daughter and I would go in for one or two things and come out with a lot more,” said Elisabeth Madison of Columbia, who was “very disappointed” with the store. “DEI isn’t a bad thing! Everyone should be represented and included.”

Madison is now looking for alternatives for where to shop that still have DEI programs in place. “Costco is one. I’ve never been a member but, with dumping Target, Lowe’s, Amazon and Meta, it is now top of my list,” she said. “I like to spend my money where my values are matched these days, so I won’t be going to Target again.”

It’s not so easy for everyone to do that, even if they want to. Having lots of choices is a privilege. Jenn Wilson, a social media friend from Evanston, Illinois, committed to scaling back, though not eliminating them completely. “I wish I could quit them but all of my local grocery chains are problematic — union busting, & an impending anti trust case following a failed merger, or Whole Foods,” she wrote in a email. “And there are a few particular name brands that are hard to swap out. That said, my Target trips will be much more mindful.”

Basically, Wilson is avoiding the familiar “so CUTE! drops into the cart” that Target is known for. “Costco & Aldi will be our primary stores with Target filling in the gaps when we have to.”

Like most decisions made for ethical or political reasons, there are nuances to quitting the Bull’s-eye. The DEI rollback announcement came right before Black History Month, which the store celebrates by highlighting Black-owned and Black-founded brands. There has been a lot of discussion about how avoiding Target not only hurts those brands but sends the message that there is not financial benefit in supporting minority-owned businesses.

Actor and vegan lifestyle guru Tabitha Brown, who has had a deal with Target since 2022, acknowledged customer concerns but cautioned about the need to support those small businesses. Some people suggested just buy those brands and nothing else, making sure they sell out. Then again, most of them have their own websites, so it’s possible to get around Target.

It’s probably impossible to completely cut out every company with questionable roots, because business is about money, not love. Madison is considering using the $50 she has left in Target gift cards and Circle bonuses to buy items to donate to charity. I’ve got about the same amount in gift cards I received for Christmas, and I’m torn between letting them sit or using them for those Black brands because I’m a single mom and those cards are basically cash.

In the meantime, I’ve canceled my Target Circle membership, made a plan with my best friend to join a farm share program buying directly from local growers and have a standing date at the 32nd Street Farmers Market in Waverly. Early last Sunday, instead of having my Target groceries delivered, I hauled my reusable bags and digital coupons over to Lidl, a company that’s kept its DEI efforts intact, at its location in Northwood, the predominantly Black neighborhood where I grew up.

We can’t control a lot in this life, but we can, at least, decide where our money goes. “I will be getting a Costco membership so my daughter and I can wander their aisle aimlessly and spend too much money there instead,” Madison said.